i'm okay with being lost.
Is it a state of consciousness or a lifestyle????
"I am free and that is why I am lost."
People in my life including friends, and family – that one Reddit chat I got warped into on a random night after a 2 am Google search – have done a great job at consoling my post-grad identity spiral. You know just the common bullshit words of encouragement followed by the patronizing but you're so young speech. In reality, they serve up side eyes like first-class passengers when you're walking to economy. The look of concern and what are you doing with your life, a daunting question that every post-grad wakes up to. It's almost like those cringy motivational post-its that mothers stick on your bathroom mirror (or is that my mom). But this time it's haunting, burnt in my mind like a scarlet letter. A familiar emotional state and something our generation seems to be burdened with – the feeling of being lost. Coincidentally that disorientation is happening in tandem with our nation's collapse.
Lucky me.
And misery loves company, besides it is the year of the snake aka evil energy for my Trumpie evangelical losers.
Not to target every pious character, but to point the finger at a specific group who had a part in the horrors against humanity. I’ll offer context to the allegory above for those who are confused. The significance of evil in conjunction with a snake comes from the Christian scripture, Genesis 3:1-24. In the story, satan uses a snake to coerce Eve into eating the apple from the Garden of Eden, the original sin that transcends generational curses—a hex believed by some evangelicals. I’m not Christian, nor do I take part in any institutional religion, and I certainly don’t believe in this misogynistic tale.
So why bring this up? Is it because I'm propagandizing you to convert? Am I trying my hand at theological existentialism? Was it just a jab at the people who elected a Cheeto into office? Or do I have too much time to ponder into the abyss of my ADHD-ridden mind?
Well, I mentioned that I’m not very religious, so definitely not the first one, and the rest are for you to decide. I bring it up to debate the idea of us being cursed with lostness. What if we are experiencing a combination of misdirection and injustices because of spiritual alienation? What happened in the Garden of Eden was seen as a separation from God through disobedience, and is interpreted by Christian scholars as the origin of our lost condition. Is it possible that we have been abandoned by a higher spiritual being, and that is causing us to feel so lonely? Helpless to all the evil in the world and our futures. Or is it just Christian theology trying to convince us that we need to reconcile with him? Eating an apple is far from what we collectively deem evil, but has been debated for so long as the origin. And NOT a reason for us to face isolation.
I guess this all goes to say I’m trying to understand, how we’ve become so lost.
In an effort to understand the purgatory we are now living in, history can be the only answer to the question above. We know history repeats itself if dummies can’t learn from their past mistakes, and sadly for us, our nation is run by idiots. It is no secret that we have arrived at dark times that are eerily similar to the mustache man's dominance. A Palestinian ethnic cleansing, immigrant concentration camps, and the pernicious effects of healthcare debt are a few parallels. The only difference is that we have daytime slavery in the prison system… oh yeah, and technology. In middle school Intro to American History class, we learned about the atrocities that occurred during the 1st and 2nd Wars. We imagined what WE would’ve done and how WE would’ve stood for peace, yet WE currently feel at a loss. Struggling to find jobs and build a simple life for ourselves, turning on the news or scrolling through the apps and seeing the world burn – it’s no wonder depression rates are up by 42% and anxiety rates are up by 61% for Gen Z. We are paralyzed in what feels like a perplexing state or spiritual alienation depending on who you ask.
In 1926 this mental state was given a name, Gertrude Stein wrote to Ernest Hemingway, “All of you young people who served in the war .. you are all a lost generation.” Expressing her concerns about the disillusionment of the youth during a heedless time. A sentiment that resonates with our current reality. To Gertrude, The Lost Generation referenced intellectuals and creatives who were silenced at the start of World War 1. Similarly to us, that decade’s youth was framed by the media as hedonistic, rebellious, and anarchistic. Among the lost crowd were people who searched for meaning behind tragedies, prompting them to write poetry and novels. Although they physically survived the wars and could pursue their art, they remained lost to the times.
History does have a way of making sense of the human experience. It can even resurface a really cool group of people who relate to us as a generation. With the recent debacle of MAGA and Project 2025, right now the US feels deep in the shitter, similar to what they had going on. Unrepresentative of the American/soon-to-be citizens lived experiences. Every day we the people wake up and spend a monotonous day working, or at least pretending to be, filled with misdirection. So yes it’s safe to admit we are the lost generation. A 2.0 if you will. They had the Roaring 20s and we have Roar by Katy Perry. The only thing holding us together is our little sweet treats and a daily dose of distraction. Which we can barely afford with our low wages, but like the creatives on Broadway say, the show must go on.
There is no better way to perform for this circus-themed America than to dive deeper into the lost trope. By this I mean, let it represent something more than just being an NPC character – reclaim the word’s meaning. Religion and legacy media use it negatively to describe people or causes, but they fail to grasp its polysemous and ambiguity truly. The misconception about being lost is that it’s directionless, but isn’t that called freedom? Having the privilege to do anything you want, help fight against old institutions, do something creative, eat a small treat, and find your niche– all while being lost. People go their entire lives feeling disoriented. Hey, if it's been around since the 1920s some would call it, a lifestyle. At this point, it’s a part of the human condition. It may just be what bonds us.
Franz Kafka wrote a lot about being lost—no surprise since he’s an existentialist, and that’s a required subject. Nevertheless, his characters faced alienation from bureaucratic systems and extreme isolation from the world. No wonder his books are popular; they are relatable to our everyday lives. His novels are the perfect examples of being lost in an empowering sense. Although the protagonists experience grief and suffering, they heal through a universal experience.
There shouldn’t be shame in feeling disconnected from society and systems, especially when they no longer serve you. Maybe they were never made for you to begin with. I think the advantages of being Lost help to prompt reflexivity, exploration, and presence. You are closer to freedom when you’re in this state of consciousness. It can lift the burden off your shoulders of trying to have the right answer or solution. That doesn’t mean you stop pursuing your goals, aiming for personal growth, or advocating for justice. It means that you get to appease pressure.
Especially with the direction the world’s going in, what is the worst case scenario for embracing your lostness?
People will have their opinions on this matter, either that I’m perpetuating laziness or complacency – which tells me you didn’t get the point. An iykyk moment. There can be a lot of fun in this self-discovery period; I mean I am writing this between interviews after all. So while my world might seem lost, rest assured it’s a lot more nuanced than that. Besides only the occasional family member, big media and religious people would say I'm lost, but I would like to believe it's because I am free.
Said all while holding your hand
elie
<3